In those days, I didn't understand anything. I should have judged her according to her actions, not her words. She perfumed my planet and lit up my life. I should never have run away! I ought to have realized the tenderness underlying her silly pretensions. Flowers are so contadictory! But I was too young to know how to love her.
Showing posts with label Knowledge (Ilm). Show all posts
Showing posts with label Knowledge (Ilm). Show all posts
Wednesday, 22 January 2014
Too Young to Know
Thursday, 26 December 2013
Compatibility of Hearts
This explains a lot... Why some people just don't get along, and never will. And others just feel a natural connection;
Mufti Muhammad ibn Adam al Kawthari:
Allah Most High has placed a natural connection and compatibility between some people, and disconnection and incompatibility
This refers to the beginning of creation in the realm of the unseen when, it is reported, souls were created before bodies, and used to meet one another. When they enter bodies (come to the physical realm); those whom they recognize, they get along with, and those whom they do not recognize, they do not get along with. Moreover, this happens because of something in common that Allah has created between them; so people who have similar characteristics
Amrah bint Abd al-Rahman says, “There was a woman in Makka who liked to joke, and she came and stayed with a woman in Madina who was like her [i.e. she liked to joke as well]. When A’isha (Allah be pleased with her) heard about this, she said, ‘my beloved (Allah bless him & give him peace) spoke the truth. I heard the Messenger of Allah saying…’ and then mentioned a similar hadith.” (Sunan Abi Ya’la)
Mufti Muhammad ibn Adam al Kawthari:
Allah Most High has placed a natural connection and compatibility between some people, and disconnection and incompatibility
This refers to the beginning of creation in the realm of the unseen when, it is reported, souls were created before bodies, and used to meet one another. When they enter bodies (come to the physical realm); those whom they recognize, they get along with, and those whom they do not recognize, they do not get along with. Moreover, this happens because of something in common that Allah has created between them; so people who have similar characteristics
Amrah bint Abd al-Rahman says, “There was a woman in Makka who liked to joke, and she came and stayed with a woman in Madina who was like her [i.e. she liked to joke as well]. When A’isha (Allah be pleased with her) heard about this, she said, ‘my beloved (Allah bless him & give him peace) spoke the truth. I heard the Messenger of Allah saying…’ and then mentioned a similar hadith.” (Sunan Abi Ya’la)
Sunday, 17 November 2013
Let them be Men
Men need to be given responsibility at a young age in order to grow up and become responsible husbands and fathers. The reason why men are so irresponsible these days and become overwhelmed when they get married is because they don't know how to cope with the duties and responsibilities that come with the new wife. Whose fault is this if not the parents? Mothers, stop Molly coddling your sons and allow your boys to be men and leaders of the ummah. And fathers allow and trust your sons to make their own decisions along with your advice and wisdom, but dont make the decision for them. The prophet peace be upon him used to put the younger Sahaba sometimes teens, at the forfront of the battle field and gave them responsibility to lead the army to war. Sometimes we miss certain aspects of the sunnah which in effect has negative backlash in the future of the children whome we one day expect to be responsible adults, dutiful husbands and leaders of the ummah. How do you expect that when one was never taught or allowed that from a young age?
Monday, 17 June 2013
Disconnected
The further you are from Allah, the harder it becomes to fight the battle. Its strange how I came across so many people, who were in a sense so anguished, and out of control. Its hard to explain. But it doesn't matter how much my heart goes out to those people, how much I want to show them the way out, and how much I want to reassure them that it will eventually be ok, they can really only help themselves.
And eventually they will realise, that that torment, that lack of control, has a direct link to your closeness to Allah. The further you are from your deen, the more you seem to be losing the fight. And for this they need to re-assess their life, what needs to change in order to stop being a slave to their desires. Because it could be that you work all day, your life is work work and more work, you may pray all your prayers, but where is the khushu in that prayer? Where is the closeness that you once felt before and how did you become so...
disconnected from your Lord? These reasons are all according to the individual, it can be due to people you interact with, who are harmful to your deen, or needing someone, whom you know is good for your deen, but your ego denies it. It could be the nature of your job, some jobs require a level of dishonesty, disloyalty, business nowadays is dog eat dog, and for this, people spend too much time trying to be the best at work, rather than trying to be the most pious Muslim. Whatever the reason, the answer is simple, and I would recommend those people to simply stop life and take time out to think:
First and foremost that person needs to be willing to make changes in their life, secondly they need to re-asses their situation to see what needs to change, thirdly they really really really need to ask Allah to help them. Because without asking, He wont give, we need to beg Him, surrender completely and beg Him to guide us. Without Him we are lost.
Without Him we are slaves to our desires, and that is as low as it gets. We have all been there, but not all of us have won the battle.
May Allah help us all.
And eventually they will realise, that that torment, that lack of control, has a direct link to your closeness to Allah. The further you are from your deen, the more you seem to be losing the fight. And for this they need to re-assess their life, what needs to change in order to stop being a slave to their desires. Because it could be that you work all day, your life is work work and more work, you may pray all your prayers, but where is the khushu in that prayer? Where is the closeness that you once felt before and how did you become so...
disconnected from your Lord? These reasons are all according to the individual, it can be due to people you interact with, who are harmful to your deen, or needing someone, whom you know is good for your deen, but your ego denies it. It could be the nature of your job, some jobs require a level of dishonesty, disloyalty, business nowadays is dog eat dog, and for this, people spend too much time trying to be the best at work, rather than trying to be the most pious Muslim. Whatever the reason, the answer is simple, and I would recommend those people to simply stop life and take time out to think:
First and foremost that person needs to be willing to make changes in their life, secondly they need to re-asses their situation to see what needs to change, thirdly they really really really need to ask Allah to help them. Because without asking, He wont give, we need to beg Him, surrender completely and beg Him to guide us. Without Him we are lost.
Without Him we are slaves to our desires, and that is as low as it gets. We have all been there, but not all of us have won the battle.
May Allah help us all.
Friday, 14 June 2013
That wishful thinking has turned you fools into losers
The Prophet, may Allah be pleased with him, said: "The wise is the one who takes account of his own deeds, and works for the life after death, and the fool is the one who pursues his whims, and lives with the hope that Allah will forgive him." (At-Tirmidhi)
Al-Hassan al-Basri said: "Some people live with the hope that Allah will forgive them until they leave this world without a single hasanah, or good deed."
Allah, the Exalted, says: "And that wishful thinking of yours concerning your Rubb has ruined you and turned you into losers." Quran 40:23.
Al-Hassan al-Basri said: "Some people live with the hope that Allah will forgive them until they leave this world without a single hasanah, or good deed."
Allah, the Exalted, says: "And that wishful thinking of yours concerning your Rubb has ruined you and turned you into losers." Quran 40:23.
Friday, 3 May 2013
Sunnah of S... II
Something I think that should be talked about more (in a controlled setting - with teachers/scholars/Councillors/people of knowledge). Simply because its something so simple, and ignorance in this matter can have such traumatic effects on people/marriages on a physical and psychological level. Due to culture we are taught to shy away from such issues, but as Muslims there is nothing wrong with developing an understanding and still remaining humble and modest about it. It's easy for people to say that these issues do not concern them, as it is simply "not in their nature", well all I can say is; make it your nature. Follow the Sunnah, or you will always fail in this.
A great piece, well done:
Sunday, 28 April 2013
Monday, 22 April 2013
And That is Enough
I've learned I will almost never get it right first time,
I've learnt not to give up, to change my methods and try again, and again.
I've learnt to trust my instincts,
I've learnt that my greatest inspirations are deeply rooted to my fears,
I've learnt that ugly people will always be ugly, and beautiful people can be even more ugly.
I've learnt that giving up on love is not the answer, nor is chasing the love that never existed.
I've learnt that I should never try to change for the sake of people's ego.
I've learnt that my inability to walk away reflects on my weak Imaan, and what I do walk away from will pursue me. Iv learnt its hard not to look back. Its really hard.
I've learnt to smile and laugh at myself when the world seems dark,
I've learnt that you will feel Allah's love at times when you are feeling so unloved, and that that love is enough.
I've learnt that in the end, the truth always comes out, no matter how hard someone tries to make you look bad. That Allah sends the rain to wash away their black lies and criticisms. I love the rain.
I've learnt that in silence I find solace...but also fear.
I've learnt to protect myself by building a wall, yet still allowing myself to watch the world and lives around me through a gap...I've learnt anyone can get in that gap.
I've learnt that I never knew what I wanted, that I was easily influenced, that I tried hard to please others and agree to their way of thinking, even if I thought otherwise, and that not knowing what I wanted led me to the wrong people. I've learnt to know what I want.
I have learnt that there are people who want you and then there are people who need you. Its better to be needed.
I've learnt the people that are furthest away will always be the ones you miss most.
I've learnt to remember the bad times and not just the good. Because in the good you have regret, and in the bad you have relief.
I've learnt that the people that harmed you will have that same harm caused upon them, that what they took
from you will undoubtedly be taken from them too in the same form or another.
I see the innocence in those younger than me, I have learnt that time will teach them too, regardless of my warnings to them.
I have learnt that I strive to always find solutions for others, but give up when I can never find them for myself.
I have learnt that not every one will understand me. Nor do I want everyone to understand me. And the ones who do, only do because, they have learnt too.
Thursday, 11 April 2013
Regrets
Its not that we regret the past, nor do we regret the people we meet, its just that we regret not knowing then, what we know now.
Sometimes a person can go to school, college and then university. They study for years in a particular field to enter into a certain profession. But it doesn't matter how much preparation you do, you never really learn until you start practicing in that profession. And suddenly all that study was almost a waste, it didn't prepare you even half as much as you needed, to be fully equipped to deal with what you have to deal with on the job.
I guess marriage is like this. You may feel like you know how to be the perfect partner, you may go to all the marriage talks that will equip you with an understanding of marriage, what kind of person to marry, how to deal with obstacles, how to deal with the mother-in-law and family members, you may have even walked away with a certificate stating that you attended such and such marriage course. You have read all the books so your now convinced that you are now fully prepared for whatever "Happily ever after" has to throw at you. And then you get married. And your like "Hang on, it wasn't quite like this in the book, or I don't think he was meant to quite react like that.." and your at square one again.
No one is really taught how to have a successful marriage until they are actually married and put under the turmoils of that marriage, only to come out from those turmoils - more educated, more learned, more prepared. We only know how marriage should be through seeing how other people are with each other, our parents, our siblings, our friends, however we don't really see what happens behind closed doors, the arguments and such, and our parents have spent years building such a close relationship like that, you can't expect your marriage to be as strong as theirs at the initial stages. Attending courses and reading books can only really give you an insight, but the real teacher is marriage itself.
We learn how to become a better spouse to our partner through every obstacle, every misunderstanding, every argument, every silent treatment, we learn the likes and dislikes of our partner, we learn what makes them tick, we learn how to make them happy and content, we learn how to deal with family members, that your mother-in-law wants a phone call every day, that your father-in-law likes his coffee strong, that your brother/sister-in-laws are total nut cases, but you learn to love them anyway - you can't possibly know any of these things before you have even met your spouse, and its this, which makes us so under equipped for a successful marriage. And to those who criticise you for being a bad spouse, say to them that no one taught you how to be a good one, you are still learning, tell them to be patient with you, for you have an urge to make your partner happy, its just that you may not always know the means of doing so, you are so to speak, "learning on the job".
Its only with persistence and perseverance, with being firm with every lesson that comes to teach you and not so weak as to run away and give up when you think you don't have the answer, believe that the answer will come to you, so long as you are sincere, and once you know what you didn't know then, you are on your way to a successful marriage inshallah.
Sometimes a person can go to school, college and then university. They study for years in a particular field to enter into a certain profession. But it doesn't matter how much preparation you do, you never really learn until you start practicing in that profession. And suddenly all that study was almost a waste, it didn't prepare you even half as much as you needed, to be fully equipped to deal with what you have to deal with on the job.
I guess marriage is like this. You may feel like you know how to be the perfect partner, you may go to all the marriage talks that will equip you with an understanding of marriage, what kind of person to marry, how to deal with obstacles, how to deal with the mother-in-law and family members, you may have even walked away with a certificate stating that you attended such and such marriage course. You have read all the books so your now convinced that you are now fully prepared for whatever "Happily ever after" has to throw at you. And then you get married. And your like "Hang on, it wasn't quite like this in the book, or I don't think he was meant to quite react like that.." and your at square one again.
No one is really taught how to have a successful marriage until they are actually married and put under the turmoils of that marriage, only to come out from those turmoils - more educated, more learned, more prepared. We only know how marriage should be through seeing how other people are with each other, our parents, our siblings, our friends, however we don't really see what happens behind closed doors, the arguments and such, and our parents have spent years building such a close relationship like that, you can't expect your marriage to be as strong as theirs at the initial stages. Attending courses and reading books can only really give you an insight, but the real teacher is marriage itself.
We learn how to become a better spouse to our partner through every obstacle, every misunderstanding, every argument, every silent treatment, we learn the likes and dislikes of our partner, we learn what makes them tick, we learn how to make them happy and content, we learn how to deal with family members, that your mother-in-law wants a phone call every day, that your father-in-law likes his coffee strong, that your brother/sister-in-laws are total nut cases, but you learn to love them anyway - you can't possibly know any of these things before you have even met your spouse, and its this, which makes us so under equipped for a successful marriage. And to those who criticise you for being a bad spouse, say to them that no one taught you how to be a good one, you are still learning, tell them to be patient with you, for you have an urge to make your partner happy, its just that you may not always know the means of doing so, you are so to speak, "learning on the job".
Its only with persistence and perseverance, with being firm with every lesson that comes to teach you and not so weak as to run away and give up when you think you don't have the answer, believe that the answer will come to you, so long as you are sincere, and once you know what you didn't know then, you are on your way to a successful marriage inshallah.
Thursday, 28 March 2013
To See Reality As It Truly Is.
I dont know about anyone elses experiences, but sometimes Allah has shown me through small signs who people realy are.
Although they have been deceitful and dishonest to me, in my naivety I make excuses for them, I hide the wrong that they are doing when really I should for once stand up for justice and face them head on, demanding explanations. But I choose not to. Sometimes its better to make excuses for you fellow muslims and allow Allah to do the rest. If they really are deceiving you, Allah will show you, and then its up to you, whether you want to foolishly carry on blindly, or be strong enough to walk away for good. Each time I gave someone a chance and made an excuse for them, some how strangely Allah showed me in ways, some ways that were purely accidental, that these people have not changed and are still dishonest. Its up to you to take notice of the sign Allah sent you, to hear Allah and be strong. There are times where we ask Allah to show us the truth, to show us which direction to turn, and when He shows us we become unhappy about it, we are in denial and we carry on making bad decisions that never will benefit us.
Deep down we all know the people and the paths that are harmful to us and the ones that will benefit us and bring us closer to Allah. We know but we are not strong enough to listen to our own instincts. Be strong enough to walk away, with the full belief that Allah will reimburse you with something so much more fitting or that those people will return to you, when they have finally realised, that they can hide their dishonesty from you - but not from Allah.
And of course the same goes for the opposite. If a person is sincere, pure and genuine, you will surely see it. Allah will not veil this from you. You will know in your heart who beautiful people are, and when you find them you should not let go of them, for they can only make your life beautiful. And you should fear that you should never hurt them, be good to them, and know, that Allah is with them, and will surely show them how ugly you are, if you are not sincere from within.
I ask Allah to help me see things as they truly are, and to show me people for who they truly are, and for the strength to base my decisions on this reality.
"In truth the conduct of our lives is the only proof of the sincerity of our hearts." -Anonymous
Wednesday, 20 February 2013
Joined at the Soul
Pondering over the whole thing about having a "soulmate" in life. And how some people are lucky to meet someone who they believe is their soulmate and others are more lucky to marry them and spend their whole life with them. And I have been wondering what is it that makes these persons so connected down to the very soul. Because thinking about it, it could be that you passionately love someone but they are not necessarily your soulmate, and that your soulmate is not necessariliy someone you are passionately in love with. And the person your in love with might be someone you actualy cannot spend your life with, because they do not give you peace and fullfillment in your life. However your soulmate, will always undoubtedly be able to offer you peace and tranquility.
Over the year or so it has been a common occurance which I have found really strange; how I tried to just live life on my own and not let anyone into my bubble. But it was strange how people came into my life and got attached to me regardless of however hard I tried to just be a "nomad". For some weird reason they really liked me and didn't want to leave me and I didn't know why that was. But because of their persistance I grew attached to them too, unknowingly letting some of them in and finding some harmony, and common ground with them. And then there were others, who I guess, I was persistant with in a futile attempt to kill my boredom and loneliness yet, I found no common ground with them, and was eager to return back into my own world after being with them. And I didn't understand why the difference was there, because they all seemed like decent/nice people.
Its just that I didn't connect with some of them on a level I connected with others.
And then I came accross a statement online (by Yasmin Mogahed) which included the following hadith and commentary which kind of answered my thoughts above:
The Prophet (pbuh) said: "The souls are (like) an army joined (in the world of spirits) whichever souls knew each other (in that world) are attracted towards each other (in this world) and whichever remained distant and indifferent (there) are disinterested to each other (in this world)" (Saheeh al-Bukhaari, Kitaab Ahaadeeth al-Anbiyaa’, Baab al-Arwaah junood
mujannadah).
*Commentary: "Ibn Hajar (may Allaah have mercy on him) said in his commentary on the hadeeth: “Concerning the phrase ‘Souls are like conscripted soldiers…’ al-Khattaabi said: ‘This may refer to their similarity as regards good or evil, righteousness or corruption. Good people are inclined towards other good people, and evil people are similarly inclined towards other evil people. Souls feel affinity with others according to the nature in which they were created, good or evil. If souls’ natures are similar, they will get along, otherwise they will not be on good terms with one another. It could be that what is being referred to is the beginning of creation in the realm of the unseen when, it is reported, souls were created before bodies, and used to meet one another and express their pessimism about the future. When souls have entered bodies (come to the physical realm) they may recognize one another from the past, and may be on friendly terms or otherwise based on that past experience.”
"Al-Khattaabi and others said: this getting along with one another has to do with what Allaah decreed from the outset about the ultimate destiny of souls, whether they will be among the blessed [in Paradise] or the doomed [in Hell]. Souls are of two opposing kinds, and when they meet in this physical world, they will either love or hate one another depending on the way they were created.
Good souls will be inclined towards other good souls, and evil souls will be inclined towards other evil souls. And Allaah knows best."
(http://islamqa.com/en/ref/3864/soul)
Following on from that, there were some people/souls who I didn't care about leaving, because I didn't really like them anyway, and then there were others who I cared for, but it still didn't hurt me to leave them, and I wondered if this was a fault in me, that my heart had become hardened, but I realise that when your connected to someone on a soul level your always connected - your not really leaving each other, only in the physical sense. It's almost like your souls know you will meet again...
And so it could be that you can never marry your soulmate, but you remain happy in letting them go knowing they are happy in life, for this very reason that the souls will one day meet again.
It is something beautiful, because people get confused; they think the people they can't live without and have strong feelings for are the ones that they should be with, and they find it difficult to let them go, its such a mental torment for them because they "love" them so much, but this "love" is just physical and in reality they are the ones that damage your soul most. Your soulmate on the other hand, although you would be a little sad to let them go in this world, you would be able to do so, knowing your parting is not eternal. And its ironic how really, the person you would be able to let go, is the person you would find most contentment in spending your life with, because that is the one who is most beneficial for your soul, and sanity.
 |
| "Goodbyes are only for those who love with their eyes. Because for those who love with heart and soul, there is no such thing as separation!" ~ Rumi |
Wednesday, 23 January 2013
Dig Deeper
Look deeper and you will see her soul,
Observing the outside without entering the door,
Was never enough for her heart to enfold,
Look into her eyes and dig deeper, explore.
You were (for some time) satisfied with the curve of her waist,With the shape of her ass, the makeup on her face,
But if only you had tried, for once, to enter from a different side,
Perhaps her satisfaction in you, would have been in full body and mind.
Won't you try and find the key. wont you try?
Only she knows that the one who unlocks the door will find,
The curves of her nature, the shape of her desire, the makeup of her dreams,
And the quality of her thoughts.
When did u last look at her, as your life time partner?
As the mother of your children, as the soulmate that helps to cleanse your soul?
Her soul...was not made to quench your desire, but it was made to beautify them,
To care for them, to tame them. Don't you thus owe her soul so much more?
She knows she makes it difficult, she is closed, tightly at times, but did you expect her
to let anyone in? Don't you think her soul guards over her heart?
The key to her heart, is through her soul so,
If you don't dig deeper then you will never know,
How to tread carefully along the cracks of her heart,
Where the streams of her tears continue to flow,
Dig deeper, think deeper, and you will never be apart.
Wednesday, 9 January 2013
Internal Cleansing
After relieving onself and on exiting the bathroom, one should ask Allah for forgiveness and say "Gufraanak" there are two opinions as to why this is so; the first being, that one is unable to recite any Dikhr or Quran during this time so one asks Allah for forgiveness for this short period where one could not utter His rememberance. The second opinion being; that one has just cleansed and externally removed the impurities built up from the body and we say Gufraanak in order to internally cleanse the impurities built up in the Heart also. My preference is the second opinion, and Allah knows best.
Monday, 3 December 2012
Pure Logic.
The more you try to control people, the more they will try to rebel against you.
The more respect you demand from people, the more they will disrespect you. Your have to earn the respect. Give respect to gain respect. Don't think you will get that respect simply because your in a certain (superior) position.
The more brittle and unflexible you are, the more people will try to break you. Try to show understanding and flexibility to other peoples needs and people will then start becoming more easier to work with, and to mould into what you need.
The more you try to talk your way out of a situation rather than just saying it how it is, the more people will think your being dishonest and a liar. Just tell it how it is and if its because you failed at providing, then say so and people will respect you for your honesty at least. Otherwise, you will end up being a constant disapointment for so many people, time and time again.
The more lack of communication you have with others, the more problems you will face with them. Dont think you can just decide things on your own and expect everyone to be ok with it. Esspecially when your trying to decide on things you dont completely understand. One meeting/or short conversation with everyone is all it takes, in order to get everyones point of view, have trust in them that they also know what they are doing and then base your decisions on this, your still the decision maker, however it shows that you actualy care about other peoples input = Respect. Good communication is key, in any kind of relationship, this is most important. And it will prevent so much future hassle of people apposing your decisions and then things need to be changed yet again. A bit of communication can go a long way.
The more inconsistent you are, the more people will get frustrated with you and not trust you.
Be consistent. People dont tolerate inconsistancy and constant changes. And things are best gained when it is gained through consistancy = organised = some thought has been put into it = trust
The more you think of your own goals, the more further away from them you will become. Everyone involved has goals, its good to remember that, and the more you work towards helping people reach their goals (either it be staff/students/spouse/children/family/friends), the quicker you find yourself reaching your own goals - when your putting others first then surely Allah will give you barakah in everything.
The more sure of yourself you are, the more others will doubt you. Always doubt yourself, dont think your always right, and dont be so arrogant to think that other people are always wrong. Its a noble thing to admit your wrong and to always worry about your intentions and sincerity. Dont allow arrogance to get the better of you.
Lastly, learn from your mistakes. You failed with the last person, or the last situation, so try not to make the same mistakes with the next ones. Because when there is a consistent pattern, your reputation will then start to fail you aswel.
I dont think this is any kind of wisdom, its just pure logic, and it amazes me how some people fail realise it.
The more respect you demand from people, the more they will disrespect you. Your have to earn the respect. Give respect to gain respect. Don't think you will get that respect simply because your in a certain (superior) position.
The more brittle and unflexible you are, the more people will try to break you. Try to show understanding and flexibility to other peoples needs and people will then start becoming more easier to work with, and to mould into what you need.
The more you try to talk your way out of a situation rather than just saying it how it is, the more people will think your being dishonest and a liar. Just tell it how it is and if its because you failed at providing, then say so and people will respect you for your honesty at least. Otherwise, you will end up being a constant disapointment for so many people, time and time again.
The more lack of communication you have with others, the more problems you will face with them. Dont think you can just decide things on your own and expect everyone to be ok with it. Esspecially when your trying to decide on things you dont completely understand. One meeting/or short conversation with everyone is all it takes, in order to get everyones point of view, have trust in them that they also know what they are doing and then base your decisions on this, your still the decision maker, however it shows that you actualy care about other peoples input = Respect. Good communication is key, in any kind of relationship, this is most important. And it will prevent so much future hassle of people apposing your decisions and then things need to be changed yet again. A bit of communication can go a long way.
The more inconsistent you are, the more people will get frustrated with you and not trust you.
Be consistent. People dont tolerate inconsistancy and constant changes. And things are best gained when it is gained through consistancy = organised = some thought has been put into it = trust
The more you think of your own goals, the more further away from them you will become. Everyone involved has goals, its good to remember that, and the more you work towards helping people reach their goals (either it be staff/students/spouse/children/family/friends), the quicker you find yourself reaching your own goals - when your putting others first then surely Allah will give you barakah in everything.
The more sure of yourself you are, the more others will doubt you. Always doubt yourself, dont think your always right, and dont be so arrogant to think that other people are always wrong. Its a noble thing to admit your wrong and to always worry about your intentions and sincerity. Dont allow arrogance to get the better of you.
Lastly, learn from your mistakes. You failed with the last person, or the last situation, so try not to make the same mistakes with the next ones. Because when there is a consistent pattern, your reputation will then start to fail you aswel.
I dont think this is any kind of wisdom, its just pure logic, and it amazes me how some people fail realise it.
Saturday, 8 September 2012
We are a test for each other.
Allah made people so diverse, they come from different parts of the world, grew up in cultures alien to us, have had experiences that have shaped them as a person. People perhaps do things, that others may find unjust/unfair or strange, yet you have to look at the bigger picture, the culture behind it, the experience that person may have had to make them like that. Their intention may have been pure, but because our experiences and culture have shaped us as a different person, we dont neccessarilly see the good intention behind their acts.
Dont blame the person, and dont even blame their experiences, because even that came from Allah.
When meeting new people, its best to approach them with an open mind, and although they may not have a sparkling reputaton for whatever reason, it might be best to just give them the benefit of the doubt anyway.
It could be that those people learnt their lesson in the past and realised they did something
which seemed unacceptable to others. So you now have the benefit of meeting such a person (at this point) - a person who realises is a renewed person, a better person - so give them a chance. Right?
Realise that you are not the only one being tested in life. The test is also on others. and just as they are a test for you, you also are a test for them.
I think we are scared of seeing others in a good light, because if they let you down, it makes it that
much harder to trust the next. However, I plan to start each new relationship with a positive impression regardless. Perhaps it will be me that lets them down. Perhaps, I am infact, a test for them instead.
I gues, we are all a test for each other.
Dont blame the person, and dont even blame their experiences, because even that came from Allah.
When meeting new people, its best to approach them with an open mind, and although they may not have a sparkling reputaton for whatever reason, it might be best to just give them the benefit of the doubt anyway.
It could be that those people learnt their lesson in the past and realised they did something
which seemed unacceptable to others. So you now have the benefit of meeting such a person (at this point) - a person who realises is a renewed person, a better person - so give them a chance. Right?
Realise that you are not the only one being tested in life. The test is also on others. and just as they are a test for you, you also are a test for them.
I think we are scared of seeing others in a good light, because if they let you down, it makes it that
much harder to trust the next. However, I plan to start each new relationship with a positive impression regardless. Perhaps it will be me that lets them down. Perhaps, I am infact, a test for them instead.
I gues, we are all a test for each other.
A Path Perfected.
You find there are always other people that know more than you. Whats more annoying,
is that they are ten years younger (grrr...I mean mashallah!). It makes me look back, I wouldn't say my years were wasted,I have gained things that others dont necessrily have, and I guess my route in life was taken in a way which Allah thought befitting of me. Perhaps if I had taken another persons path of learning knowledge, I would have gained nothing - because that path was not meant to be for me.
When I think about it, things in the past happend so precisely, an uncanny chain of events, in order to bring me to where I am now, which could have only been facilitated by Allahs perfect plan. Alhamdulillah.
Certain events may happen in life, or you may meet people, good and bad, that will make you realise, that you need to change your ways and seek knowledge; at least to protect yourself. These things may unknowingly push you down a certain path, its your choice to take it. If these events never came to us, and if we never met these people, we may have continued being even more ignorant,than we already are.
The individuals that you meet that know so much more than you? Theyr just a reminder, to keep going, at your own pace, on your own path, and not theirs.
I know that what I am undertaking now will lead me beautifully on to something else, a path that is perfected for me only.
I put my trust in Allah, that He will bring me to a destination, that is full of contentment, peace, mercy, trust, justice and Love. Something I will only find in Him.
Alhamdulillah for the experience of the last journey and Bissmillah to the next.
is that they are ten years younger (grrr...I mean mashallah!). It makes me look back, I wouldn't say my years were wasted,I have gained things that others dont necessrily have, and I guess my route in life was taken in a way which Allah thought befitting of me. Perhaps if I had taken another persons path of learning knowledge, I would have gained nothing - because that path was not meant to be for me.
When I think about it, things in the past happend so precisely, an uncanny chain of events, in order to bring me to where I am now, which could have only been facilitated by Allahs perfect plan. Alhamdulillah.
Certain events may happen in life, or you may meet people, good and bad, that will make you realise, that you need to change your ways and seek knowledge; at least to protect yourself. These things may unknowingly push you down a certain path, its your choice to take it. If these events never came to us, and if we never met these people, we may have continued being even more ignorant,than we already are.
The individuals that you meet that know so much more than you? Theyr just a reminder, to keep going, at your own pace, on your own path, and not theirs.
I know that what I am undertaking now will lead me beautifully on to something else, a path that is perfected for me only.
I put my trust in Allah, that He will bring me to a destination, that is full of contentment, peace, mercy, trust, justice and Love. Something I will only find in Him.
Alhamdulillah for the experience of the last journey and Bissmillah to the next.
Sunday, 26 August 2012
A Guide from Beyond
“Be grateful for whoever comes, because each has been sent as a guide from beyond.”
― Rumi
I remember a while back, after chatting to a friend, I say a friend, but actually I didnt know her at all at the time, but she did become someone admirable to me, mostly because she had such a beautiful and refreshing personality. She said to me that it seemed like I had been through quite a lot in a short space of time. It never really dawned on me that that was the case until she said it, I think more fitting is that I have come across many different personalities in a short space of time - I have learnt a lot about people. Yes.
When people go through some hardship, I guess its quite common for them to go through a phase of blocking others out, I was at a stage of never contacting my friends, not visiting family, turning up to classes and then leaving without speaking to anyone. Even though I kind of enjoyed being in my own world so to speak, it seems like there were still individuals who unknowlingly broke me out back into the real world - and although I cant say I would ever be my old self, I am grateful to them and to Allah for sending them to me, to show me that yes there is hope of some good and pure personalities out there. I do not claim to be amongst them, however observing the characters out there, makes me realise who I want to be like and who I would loath to be like.
Certain individuals come into our life for a reason. Allah sends specific people to us to teach us specific things about ourselves. It might be that you never ever realised how impatient you were until someone actually pushed you to your limit - how would you know ur own patience untill someone pushed you?
The people I have come across; good characters, bad ones, ones that I would like to help and others that are beyond help. I guess they scared me, not because they were not great characters, but perhaps because what it made me realise.
I look and I reflect on each person, and I think, what have they taught me about myself? That I am an unforgiving person? Because I couldnt give them a second chance. That I am a gossip? Because they managed to squeeze bits of information from me? That I am not merciful because I exposed anothers faults? That I am caniving because I considered "stabbing them in the back." That I am unjust,
because I stayed quiet rather than standing up for the truth when it was needed? That I am a fool for letting reputable losers take advantage of me.
That I am weak and out of control. That I am nothing. Althought life has taught me well, there is still much to learn. I fear the people I am to meet next but I also look forward to it, I look forward to each individual I meet that makes me a little wiser. Bring it on I say. And although I probably think now that "yeh I have met them all, I can spot them a mile off now" Im sure there are still a few characters that will catch me off guard, just to remind me that you still have so much to learn - about people (and about yourself).
I guess we are all weak in character in some way. The important thing is that we realise it and start to make a change in ourselves, so that the pain/difficulties experienced in our life are not repeated. Because I believe the difficulty comes to you because of a weakness in yourself - not in others. We spend too much time blaming others, finding the minor faults in them, rather than the obvious fault in ourselves. We should realise that it is US that need to make the change, to keep it consistent even when others dont, to fight the battle within ourselves, to always keep our guard up, because the greatest war we have to fight, is the war with ourselves.
When the companions of the Prophet (Peace and blessing be upon him) returned from the Battlefield, The Prophet would say "they have returned from the lesser war to the greater war, (the battle with the self)."
This realisation, reflection and constant effort to change is what makes us the better individual. Its what makes us better Muslims.
― Rumi
I remember a while back, after chatting to a friend, I say a friend, but actually I didnt know her at all at the time, but she did become someone admirable to me, mostly because she had such a beautiful and refreshing personality. She said to me that it seemed like I had been through quite a lot in a short space of time. It never really dawned on me that that was the case until she said it, I think more fitting is that I have come across many different personalities in a short space of time - I have learnt a lot about people. Yes.
When people go through some hardship, I guess its quite common for them to go through a phase of blocking others out, I was at a stage of never contacting my friends, not visiting family, turning up to classes and then leaving without speaking to anyone. Even though I kind of enjoyed being in my own world so to speak, it seems like there were still individuals who unknowlingly broke me out back into the real world - and although I cant say I would ever be my old self, I am grateful to them and to Allah for sending them to me, to show me that yes there is hope of some good and pure personalities out there. I do not claim to be amongst them, however observing the characters out there, makes me realise who I want to be like and who I would loath to be like.
Certain individuals come into our life for a reason. Allah sends specific people to us to teach us specific things about ourselves. It might be that you never ever realised how impatient you were until someone actually pushed you to your limit - how would you know ur own patience untill someone pushed you?
The people I have come across; good characters, bad ones, ones that I would like to help and others that are beyond help. I guess they scared me, not because they were not great characters, but perhaps because what it made me realise.
I look and I reflect on each person, and I think, what have they taught me about myself? That I am an unforgiving person? Because I couldnt give them a second chance. That I am a gossip? Because they managed to squeeze bits of information from me? That I am not merciful because I exposed anothers faults? That I am caniving because I considered "stabbing them in the back." That I am unjust,
because I stayed quiet rather than standing up for the truth when it was needed? That I am a fool for letting reputable losers take advantage of me.
That I am weak and out of control. That I am nothing. Althought life has taught me well, there is still much to learn. I fear the people I am to meet next but I also look forward to it, I look forward to each individual I meet that makes me a little wiser. Bring it on I say. And although I probably think now that "yeh I have met them all, I can spot them a mile off now" Im sure there are still a few characters that will catch me off guard, just to remind me that you still have so much to learn - about people (and about yourself).
I guess we are all weak in character in some way. The important thing is that we realise it and start to make a change in ourselves, so that the pain/difficulties experienced in our life are not repeated. Because I believe the difficulty comes to you because of a weakness in yourself - not in others. We spend too much time blaming others, finding the minor faults in them, rather than the obvious fault in ourselves. We should realise that it is US that need to make the change, to keep it consistent even when others dont, to fight the battle within ourselves, to always keep our guard up, because the greatest war we have to fight, is the war with ourselves.
When the companions of the Prophet (Peace and blessing be upon him) returned from the Battlefield, The Prophet would say "they have returned from the lesser war to the greater war, (the battle with the self)."
This realisation, reflection and constant effort to change is what makes us the better individual. Its what makes us better Muslims.
Tuesday, 17 July 2012
Letting go
"Whatever it is, You just have to let go. If you can." were her words to me...
I smiled nervously and turned away, not just to hide the tears, but from the truth aswell. I hadn't realised that the past few weeks was leading to a downward spiral attack on myself. And just as I had had enough, I said to her "I dont know what to do with myself to make it better?" and thus her response; it came so naturally as she shrugged her shoulders whilst she said it, like the answer was so simple and obvious. It was so spot on and relevant it scared me. She didnt know the story behind my recent anguish, yet somehow, she managed to see the hidden tears and she responded as if she completely understood, like she also, had been in that same dark place and learnt, that there is a way out; "just let go."
And so I carried on walking, leaving behind my reflection in the window, leaving behind. Letting go.
“If you love somebody, let them go, for if they return, they were always yours. If they don't, they never were.”
― Khalil Gibran
I smiled nervously and turned away, not just to hide the tears, but from the truth aswell. I hadn't realised that the past few weeks was leading to a downward spiral attack on myself. And just as I had had enough, I said to her "I dont know what to do with myself to make it better?" and thus her response; it came so naturally as she shrugged her shoulders whilst she said it, like the answer was so simple and obvious. It was so spot on and relevant it scared me. She didnt know the story behind my recent anguish, yet somehow, she managed to see the hidden tears and she responded as if she completely understood, like she also, had been in that same dark place and learnt, that there is a way out; "just let go."
And so I carried on walking, leaving behind my reflection in the window, leaving behind. Letting go.
“If you love somebody, let them go, for if they return, they were always yours. If they don't, they never were.”
― Khalil Gibran
Sunday, 13 May 2012
Debating Matters of Religion
A man came before Imaam Abu Hanifa and brought with him another man who was known to have a deviant belief of Islam.
The man asked Imaam Abu Hanifa "Can I pray behind this man?" Imaam Abu Hanifa Rahimullah replied "We cannot pray behind either of the two of you."
The man became surprised and asked why, and the Imaam replied "because he holds a belief that
is deviant from Islam and you, (refering to the man who asked the question), you argue about matters of religion."
Imaam Al-Ghazzali says in Bidayat Al-Hidayat that he consideres argumentation in matters of religion a major sin of its own.
These days there are Imaams/people who actually enjoy debating on matters of religion, and for some it is simply in their nature to just uneccesarily debate and constantly prove their point to others. However all this really shows, is that they themselves are uneasy and confused in their own heart and it is thus the reason why it should be avoided to pray behind such people, and in my view to stay away from such people completely.
The man asked Imaam Abu Hanifa "Can I pray behind this man?" Imaam Abu Hanifa Rahimullah replied "We cannot pray behind either of the two of you."
The man became surprised and asked why, and the Imaam replied "because he holds a belief that
is deviant from Islam and you, (refering to the man who asked the question), you argue about matters of religion."
Imaam Al-Ghazzali says in Bidayat Al-Hidayat that he consideres argumentation in matters of religion a major sin of its own.
These days there are Imaams/people who actually enjoy debating on matters of religion, and for some it is simply in their nature to just uneccesarily debate and constantly prove their point to others. However all this really shows, is that they themselves are uneasy and confused in their own heart and it is thus the reason why it should be avoided to pray behind such people, and in my view to stay away from such people completely.
Monday, 2 April 2012
Intelligence vs. Piety
She sat across the desk to me, Her side of the table surrounded her with little vases of handpicked flowers and extracts of nature she had found on her long walks in the countryside.
And after an in depth conversation partly about religion and partly about how I think I failed my exam at madrassa that weekend, she said to me "you know you dont have to be clever to be a good person," It suddenly dawned on me, that infact this was not the words of a muslim person, not even someone who even believed in God (im working on her), it was certainly the words of a wise person.
For a time I wondered, how is one meant to reach a high state of piety or at least goodness, if they are like me, striving to learn but not quite an "achiever" lets say...duas dont stick in my head,
and I dont necessarily undertsand the fiqh rulings and how or when to apply what, no matter how many time the poor Sheikh explains it...I wondered how am I supposed to "achieve" in deen when I dont have the intellect? I felt like you had to be clever to be close to Allah, and perhaps I even had a bit of a complex because people in my past made me feel like that...
I thought about her words, and yes there is an element if not a complete truth in what she stated.
she is the kind of person, who has a major admiration for nature, surrounds herself in flowers and constanly talks about the beauty of plants and animals and such and it occured to me that this person who doesnt even believe in God is actually more connected to Allah in a way she probably doesn't even realise. To love creation so much, means you are indirectly loving the creator...and this closeness one feels when they are so in touch with nature is uncomparable, how can you not be a "good person" when you have so much admiration and love for the beauty Allah has bestowed to us on earth just as a proof of his majesty?
...it has nothing to do with intellect.
That said, I will still try to pass my exams at madrassa.
And after an in depth conversation partly about religion and partly about how I think I failed my exam at madrassa that weekend, she said to me "you know you dont have to be clever to be a good person," It suddenly dawned on me, that infact this was not the words of a muslim person, not even someone who even believed in God (im working on her), it was certainly the words of a wise person.
For a time I wondered, how is one meant to reach a high state of piety or at least goodness, if they are like me, striving to learn but not quite an "achiever" lets say...duas dont stick in my head,
and I dont necessarily undertsand the fiqh rulings and how or when to apply what, no matter how many time the poor Sheikh explains it...I wondered how am I supposed to "achieve" in deen when I dont have the intellect? I felt like you had to be clever to be close to Allah, and perhaps I even had a bit of a complex because people in my past made me feel like that...
I thought about her words, and yes there is an element if not a complete truth in what she stated.
she is the kind of person, who has a major admiration for nature, surrounds herself in flowers and constanly talks about the beauty of plants and animals and such and it occured to me that this person who doesnt even believe in God is actually more connected to Allah in a way she probably doesn't even realise. To love creation so much, means you are indirectly loving the creator...and this closeness one feels when they are so in touch with nature is uncomparable, how can you not be a "good person" when you have so much admiration and love for the beauty Allah has bestowed to us on earth just as a proof of his majesty?
...it has nothing to do with intellect.
That said, I will still try to pass my exams at madrassa.
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