I remember a while back, after chatting to a friend, I say a friend, but actually I didnt know her at all at the time, but she did become someone admirable to me, mostly because she had such a beautiful and refreshing personality. She said to me that it seemed like I had been through quite a lot in a short space of time. It never really dawned on me that that was the case until she said it, I think more fitting is that I have come across many different personalities in a short space of time - I have learnt a lot about people. Yes.
When people go through some hardship, I guess its quite common for them to go through a phase of blocking others out, I was at a stage of never contacting my friends, not visiting family, turning up to classes and then leaving without speaking to anyone. Even though I kind of enjoyed being in my own world so to speak, it seems like there were still individuals who unknowlingly broke me out back into the real world - and although I cant say I would ever be my old self, I am grateful to them and to Allah for sending them to me, to show me that yes there is hope of some good and pure personalities out there. I do not claim to be amongst them, however observing the characters out there, makes me realise who I want to be like and who I would loath to be like.
Certain individuals come into our life for a reason. Allah sends specific people to us to teach us specific things about ourselves. It might be that you never ever realised how impatient you were until someone actually pushed you to your limit - how would you know ur own patience untill someone pushed you?
The people I have come across; good characters, bad ones, ones that I would like to help and others that are beyond help. I guess they scared me, not because they were not great characters, but perhaps because what it made me realise.
I look and I reflect on each person, and I think, what have they taught me about myself? That I am an unforgiving person? Because I couldnt give them a second chance. That I am a gossip? Because they managed to squeeze bits of information from me? That I am not merciful because I exposed anothers faults? That I am caniving because I considered "stabbing them in the back." That I am unjust,
because I stayed quiet rather than standing up for the truth when it was needed? That I am a fool for letting reputable losers take advantage of me.
That I am weak and out of control. That I am nothing. Althought life has taught me well, there is still much to learn. I fear the people I am to meet next but I also look forward to it, I look forward to each individual I meet that makes me a little wiser. Bring it on I say. And although I probably think now that "yeh I have met them all, I can spot them a mile off now" Im sure there are still a few characters that will catch me off guard, just to remind me that you still have so much to learn - about people (and about yourself).
I guess we are all weak in character in some way. The important thing is that we realise it and start to make a change in ourselves, so that the pain/difficulties experienced in our life are not repeated. Because I believe the difficulty comes to you because of a weakness in yourself - not in others. We spend too much time blaming others, finding the minor faults in them, rather than the obvious fault in ourselves. We should realise that it is US that need to make the change, to keep it consistent even when others dont, to fight the battle within ourselves, to always keep our guard up, because the greatest war we have to fight, is the war with ourselves.
When the companions of the Prophet (Peace and blessing be upon him) returned from the Battlefield, The Prophet would say "they have returned from the lesser war to the greater war, (the battle with the self)."
This realisation, reflection and constant effort to change is what makes us the better individual. Its what makes us better Muslims.