Monday, 22 July 2013


Forget money, looks, education, great job, even "religiousness". 
If a person can make you smile, can make you laugh, and is completely content with who you are, the way you are, right at this moment in time. Then be assured, that, you will at least have someone who will stay by your side, not turn their back on you, and keep you smiling through every difficulty that you will face together. Even the most imperfect person becomes perfect, simply by the way they make you feel; that you are a gem, a treasure, which they will never risk losing...

Focus on who is here now, and not the ones that left you. Because for sure, whoever is not content with you now, certainly never will be in the future. 

Tuesday, 16 July 2013

Delaying Marriage

Shaykh Ibn Baaz (rahimahoellah):What is required is to hasten to get married, and no young man or young woman should delay marriage for the sake of studies, because marriage does not prevent any such thing. It is possible for a young man to get married in order to protect his religious commitment and morals, and enable him to lower his gaze. Marriage serves many purposes, especially in this day and age. Because delaying it is harmful for both young women and young men, every young man and every young woman should hasten to get married if there is a man who is compatible with the woman, and if a man can find the right woman.

Ibn Mas’ood said: “If I only had ten days left to live, and I knew that I would die at the end of them, and I was able to get married, I would do so, for fear of fitnah (temptation).”

The Prophet (Peace be Upon Him): “Whoever turns away from my Sunnah is not of me.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 5063; Muslim, 1401. 

"And among His Signs is this, that He created for you wives from among yourselves, that you may find repose (calm, comfort etc) in them, and He has put between you affection and mercy. Verily, in that are indeed signs for a people who reflect" (Surah Rum : 20-21)

Monday, 8 July 2013

Isolation Became Dear to Him

Why did isolation become dear to the Prophet (Peace be upon him)? Why did he feel the need to escape to Mount Hira for deep contemplation and reflection, even before prophethood. Sometimes, it is necessary to cut all connections with the world and people, in order to renew your connection with yourself, and thus your Lord. As Imaam Al-Ghazzali says “The heart is that in which if a man knows it, he knows himself, and if he knows himself, he knows his Lord. It is that in which if a man knows it not, he knows not himself and thus he knows not his Lord.”

Saturday, 6 July 2013

When Pure Souls Meet

Sometimes you just have to let people go and find their own way in life. It could be that that path is to lead them straight back to you anyway. Trust in Allah's plan. Be patient, persevere and be content. This will only make you stronger and fully deserving of whats to come. Remember we are all on a journey, on a mission to find ourselves. And some will run away from themselves, but the self will undoubtedly follow and show them who they really are. Don't be afraid, because after you know who you are, you will know what decisions to make, you will know your purpose in life. And there are many, travelers on this journey, whom you may meet along the way. And you will find comfort in knowing, that you are not the only one and you will feel encouraged with their advice to keep going...
Appreciate that the journey of others may be longer, or bumpier than yours. Some peoples souls are in need of more cleansing than yours and all that will make them fully deserving of you too. You are not at loss. Because in the end, pure souls will meet, knowing that the journey of searching was a journey of purification, so that they may finally, find peace with one another.

Marriage and Insecurities

Insecurities are common for every marriage or relationship. I of all people know that. And these insecurities can grow, especially if one fails in their past relationships. Its common to blame ourselves for a marriage not working, saying we were not good enough for such a person, in one way or another and we make the mistake of looking for people that we think suit us better, but in fact, they actually suit our insecurities. 
What I mean by this is that we look for people "lower" than us, or more needy of us, so that it makes us feel we are totally in control. But in truth our insecurity is in control, because instead of dealing with it and overcoming it, we are only feeding it, growing and nurturing it to become something of a phobia. We need to realise, its all a state of the mind, and the mind is such a powerful tool. This is not about fighting, and winning the war of your insecurity, this is about being intelligent enough to deal with the problem after you have realised it. 

How to deal with it?
It depends on what your insecure about. It could be looks, it could be lack of knowledge or intellect, it could be that I think my partner will get bored of me, its all a state of the mind, and they all require simple communication, with yourself and with your partner.
Talk to them, ask them what they love to talk about, ask them how they love to see you dressed, ask them about what they want, and then work on it. Maybe you will keep failing at it, for example, I am not great at talking politics, but the more I try to talk about it, the more informed I will become, the closer I will become to developing my own ideas and feelings about it, and even my own opinions, and strategies. Its a step by step process, one which you may fail at some steps and seem a bit dumb, but don't take it so seriously, its important to be able to laugh at yourself and your own mistakes, and have fun in teaching each other, and don't allow the other person to feel stupid, we are what we are at the end of the day, we are all learning here and a sense of humour goes a long way in relationships, marriage should be fun, lets not forget that, because we are on this journey together.

We always tend to imagine the worst in our heads, especially us women, most likely its not even like that. We over think things and play things up so much in our heads that it becomes a mini drama. But in fact, this thing that you find such a massive problem, really isn't so massive. Find something else in the relationship to concentrate on, something you know your good at, making people laugh, informing them of interesting information, cooking, and physiologically your confidence with naturally increase, and once you have reached this level, you will start to naturally feel confident in other things too, allow it time, to take its own course, step by step. 

Running away from marriage is not the answer, not for long term anyway. 
Trying again and working on it with your partner is. We are all scared of failing, but if we don't try then neither will we succeed.  Marriage is about teamwork, friendship, understanding, you should want to help each other be better partners, most importantly, you should allow your partner to help you, we just need to try, because in effect this makes us better slaves of Allah. 

And Allah knows best.

Wednesday, 3 July 2013

Frustrations in Egypt

Bissmillahir rahmanir raheem,

It wasn't the electricity cutting off for hours that frustrated me, nor was it the water being cut off for days on end, nor the increase in prices of local produce, or even the masses of rubbish accumulating on the streets. It was saying goodbye. And everyone knows how I hate goodbyes. I have said goodbye 3 times in the last 12 hours. To people who came to Egypt to seek knowledge and some for the betterment of their children's islamic upbringing. And now they feel the need to leave for what seems to be threatening this initial intention. Its really sad.

Fair vote, fair elections, is the only reason Morsi was elected. Doesn't it make sense to let him finish his course and re-elect, if after he has proven to do nothing for this impatient country? Truth is, most people on the street don't even know whose side they are on, pro-morsi or not, they just want change. The problem is, they want it too fast and join in the demonstrations purely for this reason, whereas for others, its just a reason to go out and party. And who is "egging them on" Morsi's oposition, of course. Those who have made his time in government not an easy ride. Those who behind the scenes, burst water pipes so we went without water for weeks, those who stole the petrol and threw it in the desert. Those who are paying people to cut the electricity and make our lives as inconvenient as possible. All these things done deliberately to frustrate the people, and then suddenly BANG, they ignite the spark to demonstrate and then let the dumb people do the rest. They are being played like puppets, if only they realised. Its not a new government that they need, its a new way of looking at things, wisdom, patience, and understanding of the reality of whats happening.

Bearded men getting attacked on the streets, and niqabis not safe to walk in peace, this is what they wanted all along, their plan of turning muslims against muslims, to divide us and to wipe out Islam. And it is the fact that Deen is not strong in their hearts which is the reason for them being so blind and delusional.
Ya Allah give them patience, understanding, and make them strong in Deen. Ameen.

Alexandria Egypt.